Wedding Tips Make Your Own

Question: Wedding tips...am i allowed to ask guests to pay for their meal? or is that a wedding taboo?

(Posted by: candi06 on 2006-10-24 10:58:49)

I'm trying to do my wedding on a budget, and i need to know if that would offend any of my guests.

Posted by: javy on 2006-10-24, 11:00:23

That would be soooo ghetto

Posted by: tinkerbell on 2006-10-24, 11:00:35

I'M SORRY , BUT IT WOULD OFFEND ME, IF I WAS ASKED TO PAY FOR MY MEAL.

Posted by: prime on 2006-10-24, 11:00:51

It should be ok... it's your wedding.

Posted by: Andastra on 2006-10-24, 11:00:54

When someone is your guest you are expected to be a host, which includes providing the meal. If you are on a budget have a small intimate wedding instead of a large one.

Posted by: ☻TayLee☻ on 2006-10-24, 11:01:00

I think it would offend them. I went to a wedding once,where we had to pay for our drinks(including sodas) , I thought that was tacky. It's totally up to you though,maybe if they didn't have to buy a wedding gift or something it would be ok.

Posted by: Kiely98 on 2006-10-24, 11:01:34

No, you cannot ask guests to pay for their own meal. You are inviting them to a party, and you are expected to provide their food. Unless you decide to have a very informal reception--you could ask everyone to bring a covered dish to share. That's perfectly acceptable, but it is not okay to ask people to pay for their own food. If you can't afford a full meal, why not have a champagne and cake reception, or a tea reception? Both are very classy, and much less expensive than serving an entire meal.

Posted by: david s on 2006-10-24, 11:01:49

Do not ask your guest to pay for there food, If you were invited to someones wedding would you pay for your own food? want to cut cornners? buy your own flowers and make the decorations your self. Have a familly member good at baking make yor cake for you.... do somthing like that but dont make people pay.

Posted by: marij on 2006-10-24, 11:01:51

Yes it is offensive, if you are trying to save money cut the guest list, but don't expect people to pay to go to your party

Posted by: stewpid on 2006-10-24, 11:01:53

If they are "guests ", asking them to pay is not good. maybe you need to elope and tell everyone where you're going and they can be there if they like.

Posted by: Tita on 2006-10-24, 11:01:54

Tacky. Why not do a wedding that doesn't involve the typical tradition...and do something different that you both will enjoy and remember for the rest of your life. Let them eat cake!

Posted by: RuneAmok on 2006-10-24, 11:01:55

I would be offended. I think you'd better look at other ways to cut your budget. I could offer suggestions for doing so, but my dream wedding is an elopement, so we might be on different pages!

Posted by: Supate on 2006-10-24, 11:02:02

Don't have a wedding if you can't afford to pay for the meals. That is tacky and NO one would attend. If you expect a person to pay for THEIR meal include that you are not to receive any gifts. I venture to bet your day will be a wash because NO one would attend. That is really really ghetto!

Posted by: knightanais on 2006-10-24, 11:02:25

It would me i would expect that to be coverd.you can say though that you want like we call madrina= godmother of something like the cake the and so on and so on that basically means that will be their gift to you.(SO EITHER YOU WANT A BUDGET WEDDING OR A BUNCH OF TOASTERS)

Posted by: judith r on 2006-10-24, 11:02:30

That's a taboo, I suggest you just offer finger foods, buffet style, instead of a sit down dinner. that way you can make them yourself for far less thanthe $15 a head that most hotels cost. Also consider holding the reception in a community centre, since those are also cheaper than a hotel banquet hall.

Posted by: Alexandra B on 2006-10-24, 11:02:59

That would be pretty cheesy, and cheap. Think about the fact they are coming to help you celebrate your wedding, they already have to find a outfit, pay for a gift, and take the time to help you celebrate. A better plan might be to do a buffet of appetizers (finger food), not a full dinner. Much cheaper, and less tacky.

Posted by: Amy on 2006-10-24, 11:04:00

It would. That would be tacky. Maybe a small buffet with fruits, vegetables and meats/ cheeses? If someone asked me to pay for my meal at a wedding, not only would I not attend, I would only send a card. It is gauche. There are all sorts of options, we had a beautiful wedding on a budget (which we refused to make our parents pay for...what is all THAT about?) and we had a lovely buffet at the reception site at a very reasonable price. We had a morning wedding so people didn't expect a sit down dinner....maybe that would be an option? Best of luck on your marriage and congratulations! If you need any hints or ideas, feel free to contact me, I would be happy to share some tips with you :)

Posted by: onlylove41 on 2006-10-24, 11:11:07

That would be horribly tacky! -you can do a smaller wedding -you can have a carry-in where you provide the drinks and meat -you could do it at a time away from a meal time and just provide veggie trays cake and drinks don't, do not, don't, don't, don't ask people to pay for anything! that's awful! they are coming to celebrate you and your commitment and most come bearing expensive gifts or cards full of money. don't do something tacky and ruin it.

Posted by: Careatha F on 2006-10-24, 11:13:23

Well in the Etiquette way you don't do that but, if you need them to pay simply tell them that this is not a dictatorship its a democracy and ask them to add a donation.

Posted by: karmatosis on 2006-10-24, 11:19:28

In order not to be redundant and waste your time (and mine) I read all the endless replies (before mine) which go on at infinitum and I simply wanted to tell you: You're on a budget, correct? There are ways to cut costs, for example a morning wedding (as one person suggested) or finding ways around preparations and locations, as far as it is functional, makes you comfortable and is not putting-off, your wedding will be a success. Now, I may be a little bit out of line but your wedding mustn't be uncomfortable for your guests, just imagine you being invited to a wedding and you bought an expensive gift and a new dress and took time out of your life to go see these people getting married, and then they tell you please pay for your meal!! Hey, that may not have occurred to you, but don't worry, I am here to give you help if you need it, and remember its your special day, hope it goes well.

Posted by: kalliste on 2006-10-24, 11:21:23

Sincerely,i don't advise u to do that! but u can do whatever u want,it's ya wedding!but i wonder who would be pleased to come there to pay the meal...